A Couple takes on discipline

It has been almost 21 years since Dan and I got married.

When I think about all we have experienced together—Multiple Sclerosis, caregiving, advocacy, speaking, writing, and simply navigating everyday life—I am incredibly grateful. But lately, I’ve realized something.

We need a tune-up.

Not because our marriage is in trouble. Not because we’re unhappy.

We simply need to be more disciplined.

Living with Multiple Sclerosis means taking care of ourselves isn’t optional. Yet somewhere along the way, a few habits have started working against us.

For starters, we stay up too late. We know better.

People with MS often learn that sleep is one of the most important tools for managing MS symptoms, yet too many evenings we find ourselves sitting in front of the television, watching Apple TV, and sharing a bowl of popcorn long after we should be getting ready for bed.

What starts as a harmless snack often turns into late-night munching, and before I know it, my Weight Watchers plan has gone completely off the rails.

Of course, I am still tracking my food in my handy WW app, but tracking only helps if I’m willing to be honest about what I’m doing. Lately, I’ve ended too many weeks deep in the negative points. The evidence is right there in front of me.

Why?

Because I can do better. Actually, Dan and I can do better. We have to.

My Aunt Polly used to say, “Skinny people go to bed hungry.” I didn’t always appreciate that wisdom, but I do now.

Sometimes discipline means being slightly uncomfortable. It means saying “no” to the extra snack, turning off the television, and heading to bed when we’d rather stay up.

Honestly, considering our aging and Dan’s hernia surgery earlier this year, I need to lose weight now more than ever.

Meanwhile, Dan is getting up early twice a week for physical therapy. It’s an important part of maintaining his strength and mobility while living with MS. Even his physical therapist has noticed he’s weaker than he used to be, and that concerns both of us.

Strength, function, and independence all matter.

I don’t possess the magical powers to stop MS from doing what MS does.

But I also cannot sit back and watch Dan lose strength without a fight.

The same is true for me.

The reality is that neither of us is getting any younger. This is the oldest we’ve ever been.

Yet another reality is just as important: We will never be this young again.

The time to make changes isn’t next month or after the holidays or when life slows down.

The time is now.

That doesn’t mean we’re chasing perfection, setting impossible goals, or pretending that discipline will somehow cure our MS.

It simply means being intentional, starting with:

Getting ready for bed at 10 p.m.

Skipping the late-night popcorn.

Following through with healthy choices.

Doing the physical therapy.

Showing up for ourselves.

Showing up for each other.

Dan and I have learned after nearly 21 years of marriage that living well with Multiple Sclerosis requires constant adjustments. Every now and then, we have to pause, evaluate what’s working, and make changes as needed.

This is one of those times.

A Couple Takes on MS has taken on a lot over the years.

Now we’re taking on discipline.

Not because we’re looking for perfection but because we’re still fighting for the best life possible.